"Why Ryan...that's almost like humor"

Hello and welcome to another addition to my wonderful unread blog. I was really starting to lose interest in this but not enough I stopped checking how many hits I get every day. I seem to be getting some everyday now. The 27th for instance I got 6 although three of those were from someone using AOL so it may have been the same person. But even so that's four hits in one day. Since I'm accustomed to no hits or one if I was lucky this looks good. On the other hand I've been looking at my counter's features and it looks like people are finding my archived pages via Google searches for famous quotes from The Simpsons and Futurama. So I don't even know if anyone is actually reading any entry at all, recent entries or whatever. Because, ya see, my counter is on all the archive pages too. So any hit to any number of pages just shows up as a hit. So if you're really reading please send me e-mail. Use the address at the left. The one saying I'm trying to defeat the evil spam bots. Come you can figure that out can't ya? Just write a 1 second note saying "d00d ur bLof suc0r". Don't be so elaborate though...

Of course I'm a little conflicted if I even want anyone to read this. I mean read this blog and you might actually know me a little too well. Well note really, I mean I hardly ever use vulgarity in real life. And I'm definitely an introverted person in real life. So I'm an introvert who's extroverted in his blog. So it's whine about no hits but be nervous of many hits because then people will see into the true me. Or whatever.

So what is there to write about now? How about my job? Ok so I've self-taught myself how to do technical support over the phone. No, I did not receive any training. Any complains about my abilities can be sent to /dev/null or shoved up your ass whatever comes first.

Jeeze where'd that come from? So I think I'm finally a full-fledged tech support after 5 weeks of 7 hours a day 6 days a week. Well a 40-hour a week so not 7 days. Yeah whatever. I just about got my questions down to fine system. There's several levels of user ability ya see. If I ask "user name?" and the person "John Jay Doe the second" I know it's particular type of user because I said user name not what's your name. Damn stupid people. Now if they actually CAN tell me their user name and spell it out for me just so I can do that annoying thing only called "my job" they're really in the upper echelon. Then it's just figuring out which version of Windows they have.

You wouldn't think this would be so difficult to figure out. I mean it only says it in extremely large type when you turn the friggin’ computer on. Also when click start IT SAYS IT VERTICALLY ON THE FUCKING LEFT. Come on people. Just a little of creativity or observation would be nice. It's really not hard to find. Ok? Ok so we got the username and the version of Windows you're using...and it only took ten minutes! Now what's your problem?

Can't connect? Ok click start. The start button. Left click. Left click start.

Ok kill me.

Silence.

Did you click start?

[What you expect I can see your screen? How the fuck would I know? Tell me what's going on people!]

Ok now click control panel.

At this point if you're using windows XP your control panel is either blue with "pick a category" or white with icons. Again I can't see your screen. Can't you work me here?

Ok bring up Internet Options. Great we're an eighth of the way there. DOUBLE click Internet Options. DOUBLE LEFT click Internet Options.

Ok again. Can you work with me here? Ok click the Connections Tab. CONNECTIONS. Gah.

Ok boring my self to death I haven't even gotten to the wizard to setup the stupid connection yet! This is what I do every day. Over and over with the connection wizard. With the left click. With the whatever. I'm putting my self to sleep just writing about it. I hope this was oh-so-fun. But I'm going to bed. So goodnight.

The title of the last entry, "Holy Shit!!", could be from any number of sources. In X-Men 2 for instance, Wolverine was fighting this antagonist (Lady Deathstrike although she never talks and no one ever mentions her name) when she suddenly extends her nails out similar to his claws. I could just some how "feel" the entire audience of the theater thinking to themselves "holy shit!" then suddenly Wolverine himself lets out a "holy shit!". I guess everyone else was thinking this because the audience started laughing. Or, as mentioned in the last entry, this quote could be from the first American Pie movie. The high-schooler audience was watch a certain something on a web cam and the various cast members were heard to exclaim each in turn "holy shit!". That movie was actually "alright". Sort of.

  ¶ 2:02 AM